This is one of those personal outbursts which I may later regret having posted, but I'm in the grip of it right now.
If you Google "LDR" or "long distance relationship", you will come up with mountains of closely reasoned and perceptive stuff about the dangers and difficulties encountered by those who embark on a love-based relationship at long distance.
Does this stuff actually help? Maybe it helps some people, but, if it goes wrong, however much right on self-awareness psycho-babble you may ingest, it just fucking hurts, and that's all there is to be said about it from my point of view.
If you have an Achiles Heel in your temperament, an LDR will find it out, with none of the magic of physical closeness to cement the bonds between you.
We can't help with whom we fall in love of course, but you may just have rather more fun sticking your fingers into a light socket if you find your potential soul mate in someone you can't actually hold or experience physically.
I will feel better soon, but that's currently howit is.
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You know what, Reg? They do suck, but they can also work well. What one has to do is keep a goal in mind, but keep it loosely. Things change all the time. If true, self sacrificial love is present, it won't fail.
ReplyDeleteThank you, you're right, and I'm calming down slowly. I shall leave the post there for a while at least, as a testament to the extremity these things can provoke.
ReplyDeleteThis is the first time I've ever experienced such intensity, and my particular temperament and the distance seem to make for a volatile mixture.
Solution? Deep breaths, and going back to what I know to be true. Putting the love I'm lucky to feel and to have in the context of the world as it really is. I guess that's how you find out what you've really got, rather than wasting your time fretting about what you might lose.
Food for positive action rather than thought perhaps.
Any other LDR sufferers out there?